The Mood Board

On the advice of an art director friend of mine I made a couple of mood boards to help me come up with ideas for the decoration of the cafe. It's a great way of doing research and putting together a visual picture of what you have in mind. I suppose I could also do a few sketches to convey ideas but this feels more tactile and I love doing image research anyway, especially if it's for something that really interests me. I would like the cafe to have a feminine and elegant feel to it but for it also to be fun and a bit eclectic. It needs to be somewhere that people would like to linger and feel comfortable enough to drink lots of tea and eat cake (of course).

The cafe as it stands is an old photographic studio and is perfect as a blank canvas on which to create this cafe. Light pours into the space as there are two huge windows at the front and that also means that we can create beautiful displays and decorate the glass from time to time if we feel like it... there's a little area outside where people can sit at a table and take tea and I would like to decorate it with flowers and plants so that it looks pretty outside as well.

Returning to the theme of the original post on my blog "home". I guess this desire of mine to decorate comes from the same place as wanting to create a home. It's definitely a creative urge and I think that although I don't have a family of my own I still like to create a feeling of "home" where ever it may be or whatever form it takes. When I am involved in making something I'm searching for the best bits of myself and I try to put these together in a form that other people can understand and appreciate.

I've always enjoyed giving parties as well. It's hard work but also very satisfying to create a lovely atmosphere and open up one's home to friends. That's my ideal way of being sociable. I don't do it that often but when I do I like to make sure there's plenty to eat and drink and that my home looks and feels a comfortable place for my friends to relax and enjoy themselves.  Oh God, I think I just sounded a bit like Nigella but so what... although she may have turned into a rather crazed domestic goddess I like the way she writes her cookery books. She encourages the reader to try out recipes and not aim for perfection and I'm all for that. It's about making something that looks and tastes lovely without falling into the trap of trying to make it perfect. My pavlova's a happy pavlova!

So hopefully this cafe will be a place which exudes charm and invites people to feel comfortable and be happy. Tea and cake, who could want more?

Sketching

 

I went to see the Imperial Chinese Robes from the Forbidden City at the V&A Museum and took my sketch book. Most of these textiles have never left China. They remained in the Forbidden City stores for hundreds of years, treated as sacred and carefully tended even though the Opium and World wars, Boxer and Taiping rebellions, and the dissolution of the entire imperial system exploded around them. As soon as the emperor, empress, concubines and their children died, their clothing was taken to the stores, never to be worn again, never exposed to sunlight and the various effluvia of humanity. The collection is so enormous that it is has taken almost a century since the opening of the Forbidden City to catalog all the pieces. That’s five generations of curators dedicated to the task.

The exhibition includes a wedding gown made in 1889 when Yehe Nara Jingen married the emperor Guangxu, which took three years to make. It is richly embroidered with dragons and phoenix, on red silk, the colour for weddings: the last boy emperor Pu Yi recalled that when he married in 1922, two years before he was expelled from the Forbidden City, the bridal chamber “looked like a melted red wax candle”.

The garments followed a strict hierarchy: bright yellow for the emperor, apricot yellow for his sons, Siberian sable only for the imperial family, pale blue for moon ceremonies, padded robes embroidered with narrow rows of gold to look like metal armour for travelling with an entourage of 3,000 people, 6,000 horses and 1,000 boats. Ordinary Chinese people could never have afforded the sumptuous dragon embroideries, but were in any case forbidden by law to use them.

I found the whole exhibition fascinating and would love to have gone back again but the exhibition ended the the next day. Keeping a visual record of what I've seen is becoming more and more important to me. I like that I now have more confidence in my drawing abilities and feel able to make a little sketch instead of taking a photo when I want to remember something. It feels more meaningful than simply taking a snapshot with a camera. You really have to look and explore your subject as you make your marks on the paper. You also have to be quick as there's never much time and you are forced to make quick decisions about what it is that you find interesting and try to convey that in the sketch. Having said that, drawing can be very intuitive and there's something great about just losing yourself in the act of painting or drawing. It's as if the whole world just melts away and you focus only on creating an image.  I'm learning to be happy with what I've made instead of always looking at how it could be improved and that's quite a significant shift for me.

I'm hired!

Today I had my first baking job at CC's cafe in Queen's Park. It took me three hours to get these two girls done. It's a good thing I took along some pastry I'd already made otherwise it would have taken a lot longer. I cooked in the cafe while the waitress nattered to me. At one point I had to make the lemon curd so I went into the professional kitchen next door where the real cooking is done for the restaurant. Wow! now I know that expression "if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen!" It's seriously hot in there. I included the last pic to show the potential of the place. It's done in a haphazard sort of way but has loads of potential to be something really special (I think).  I have decided to let it be a practise ground for me. I don't care what I get paid as she is providing me with a spring board to bake cakes, and build up a reputation as a baker.

This was a little test run for me and they've said they would like to give me more shifts. This is just the way I want to approach my baking. I'm given free reign to bake what I like and to do it at my own pace. What could be better? If I joined a slicker outfit I'd probably have to re-create the cakes and tarts they already sell and although that would probably present an interesting challenge, I prefer it this way. My cakes aren't intended to be "perfect" as that idea makes me feel very nervous and I would always feel that they're not "good enough". I hate that sort of pressure. This is more relaxed and I feel I can be myself. I am learning to be more precise in what I do but there always be a little flourish of creativity in what I do. When I was studying illustration at art college we were always encouraged to not worry about making mistakes and to make a virtue out of them. There will always be unfortunate blips in baking ie. things curdle, cakes don't rise, and soufles collapse but I guess you just have to learn how to cope... and improvise. Anyway, today went well and I have got my foot on the first rung of the baking ladder so I'm happy.

A thing of beauty

Yessss!!!!! I've just ordered my KitchenAid mixer and I am quietly very excited... looking forward to making mountainous meringues, soft delicate sponges, bouncy bread etc etc. And I've also got a meeting set up with a cake shop. I think I might be making some progress in my culinary life. I've been marketing my cakes recently and it seems to be paying off. I am thrilled. I think my Granny would be proud as she was the queen of meringues at the WI in Petersfield in the 70s and people would come from far and wide to taste her delectable cakes and tarts. Maybe I'm carrying on a family tradition... I love the creativity of baking. It’s fun. I enjoy choosing my ingredients and giving myself the challenge of a new recipe. It gives me huge pleasure. I trained in Illustration at art college and I have tried to channel my creativity into my baking.

I was given a lovely cookery book when I was small called “My learn to cook book”. It showed how to make chocolate crunch, victoria sandwich and croque monsieur with wonderful illustrations. They all became firm favourites in our family. I turned my nose up at school lunches and would regularly bake a victoria sandwhich with lurid coloured icing on top and include it as part of my homemade lunch. It was an important stage in learning how to take care of myself at school. As anyone who knows me will testify, I continue to believe in giving little presents to myself as part of the reward for life's hard struggles! I haven't decided yet which recipe I will chose to christen my lovely new mixer but I hope that it will set a precedent for happy baking.
 
Oh yes, on a crazy impulse I decided to enter the Great British Bake Off Competition on the BBC. There's a new series scheduled for the spring. I'm not sure whether to laugh at the idea of competitive baking but found this programme strangely compelling... anyway a friend suggested I have a go, so why not? Wish me luck!

Family

This photo reminds me so much about the past and my sense of family. It was taken in the 70's when I was about 14 years old and I am standing with my brothers and cousins outside in their garden in Wiltshire. I think we were en route to our usual sunny holiday in the Channel Islands. I am standing next to my best friend and the funny thing is that we fell out later on that summer because she fancied my older brother (not in the photo) and they had a fling on holiday.  I never forgave her!! Anyway, I love this photo because it reflects a time of innocence. There was plenty of boisterous rivalry between us but we were all connected as brothers and sisters, cousins and dogs (of course!). I was beginning to feel a little more sophisticated as a teenager but I was still very much enveloped in the rough and tumble of family life. I'm nostalgic about those days because I felt I belonged to a happy tribe and it felt good.

This sense of belonging is part of what I'm trying to explore in my blog. I feel it's very important to feel that you belong somewhere or with someone. Sometimes it feels like I'm completely alone and battling with the obstacles thrown in my path. And then I can meet someone, or get involved in something, which makes me feel it's all worthwhile and I feel part of something bigger than just myself. I love this feeling. It can be after a great conversation with a friend, or after I've just cooked a lovely meal and everyone's enjoyed it. The list goes on and on...

Maybe I'm feeling optimistic that Spring is round the corner. Winter has gone on for long enough and I want to feel happy again.

Sophie and John

My friends Sophie and John are getting married on Saturday. It's an exciting day for them and I'm looking forward to joining them for the festivities. I've made them this little painting and it's based on one of the little charms from Sophie's jewellery. I also chose a couple of lines from the Romantic poet John Keats to express the sentiment of love between two lovers:

Two souls with but a single thought
Two hearts that beat as one.

It's a beautiful thought expressed simply and elegantly.

I wish Sophie and John much happiness together.

Life Drawing

I started going to life drawing classes a few weeks ago. It's been good for me to work on a bigger scale and try out different materials. The class is nearby and is run by a lady called Bobby who was at the Royal College of Art and actually gives tuition in the class, instead of just leaving us to get on with it. The class is quite challenging as we are encouraged to really question the way we look at what's in front of us in the studio. The act of drawing and painting is a fascinating mind-game as you gaze at what is in front of you and try and make a connection with the marks you are putting down on the paper.

This week we had an exercise that totally confused me at first. Bobby asked us to forget about drawing the figure but look at what surrounds the figure as well. Start by drawing a small part of the figure and see where it leads you on the page, tracing the line to furniture, other figures in the studio... I found this very difficult at first and kept wanting to draw figuratively but eventually after several goes I got it. You start to look at the figure as a three dimensional object and in relation to what's around it. It helps you to place the figure on the page and really understand the shapes. Anyway I was quite pleased with myself that I could take a step in a new direction and, after a few crossed wires, I felt that I made some progress in my drawing.

Life drawing in general can help you to make little shifts in the way you think. I feel that it's similar to yoga practice as it depends entirely on your attitude to the pose and how you approach the exercise. Allowing yourself to make little changes and relax into the drawing process is what makes it work for me.

I am particularly enjoying going to this class as it is nearby and helps to make me feel more connected to what's going on around me. I discovered that my neighbour also goes to the same class so we have begun to have neighbourly suppers after class too! All very positive.